THE GRATEFUL GODDESS AND A STROKE OF LUCK With Karen Pulver

Howard Brown: 00:00:04

Hello, it's Howard Brown. It's the Shining Brightly

Howard Brown: 00:00:06

Show. Oh my goodness, I have a very dear friend, a very special

Howard Brown: 00:00:11

guest, Karen Pulver, how are you and welcome.

Karen Pulver: 00:00:15

Thank you so much, Howard. So glad to be here.

Howard Brown: 00:00:19

So nice. It's so nice to see you. You've got such

Howard Brown: 00:00:22

an incredible story that I want to share with the audience

Howard Brown: 00:00:25

tonight. And, you know, you've, you're really an incredible

Howard Brown: 00:00:30

person. And you're beautiful inside and out. I want everyone

Howard Brown: 00:00:33

to know that right now, as we become friends, and you've done

Howard Brown: 00:00:37

coaching for me. So I just say I want to say I really appreciate

Howard Brown: 00:00:41

you, and thank you for coming on. All right, so let me tell

Howard Brown: 00:00:43

you a little bit about Karen. She is the multi faceted

Howard Brown: 00:00:47

individual. And you have had a remarkable journey. You are a

Howard Brown: 00:00:51

podcaster a model actress, a mother and a teacher, were going

Howard Brown: 00:00:55

to ask about that little more detail about that. A cancer and

Howard Brown: 00:00:58

a stroke survivor. Karen's passion for empowering women led

Howard Brown: 00:01:03

her to found a women's group in Chicago called the grateful

Howard Brown: 00:01:06

goddesses. Within this group, women gathered in various venues

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to listen to inspiring speakers, and engage in activities curated

Howard Brown: 00:01:15

by Karen, to enhance their lives, what a beautiful mission.

Howard Brown: 00:01:19

So in 2009, you established the grateful goddesses, and then you

Howard Brown: 00:01:25

actually started to share your challenge of being diagnosed

Howard Brown: 00:01:28

with cancer, we're going to talk about that, and I'll let you

Howard Brown: 00:01:30

share a little bit more about that. But you grew strength from

Howard Brown: 00:01:32

this group yourself, even though you were actually basically

Howard Brown: 00:01:36

leading it as well. In 2019, as the pandemic hit, you launched

Howard Brown: 00:01:42

the podcast of the same name as a virtual platform, because we

Howard Brown: 00:01:45

weren't gathering, but you were bringing together people all

Howard Brown: 00:01:48

over the world. And you are basically expanding, you know,

Howard Brown: 00:01:54

the the physical aspects, the mental aspects and the spiritual

Howard Brown: 00:01:57

aspects of dealing with the pandemic, dealing with, you

Howard Brown: 00:02:01

know, being a woman and, and also a mom and in the pandemic.

Howard Brown: 00:02:06

And these personal interactions on part of your weekly show,

Howard Brown: 00:02:10

allowed you to really learn from them, and you all became, you

Howard Brown: 00:02:16

know, a tight knit group. And next phase of your life, you

Howard Brown: 00:02:21

actually turned all this wonderful knowledge to be a

Howard Brown: 00:02:24

coach, and you actually at the Adler School of Psychology, and

Howard Brown: 00:02:30

then all of a sudden, you were struck down again, with a

Howard Brown: 00:02:33

stroke. And we're gonna, we got to talk about that, because this

Howard Brown: 00:02:36

is an incredible story. But you gotta have all this in your

Howard Brown: 00:02:40

goddess toolbox and you rehabilitate yourself, your

Howard Brown: 00:02:43

resilience, your positivity do shine through. And that's why

Howard Brown: 00:02:46

you're shining brightly with me tonight, and you've navigated

Howard Brown: 00:02:50

these health challenges. And you are moving forward, and you're

Howard Brown: 00:02:55

helping others. And at the end of the day, that's really what

Howard Brown: 00:02:58

it's all about. And so you have a motto here, you always had the

Howard Brown: 00:03:02

power, my dear, you just have to realise it. That's beautiful.

Howard Brown: 00:03:07

And you're a beacon of positivity, empowerment, and you

Howard Brown: 00:03:10

embody the spirit of growth and transformation. So that's a

Howard Brown: 00:03:14

beautiful introduction. But tell me something that we may not

Howard Brown: 00:03:19

know about you. Let's share a little secret about Karen. What

Howard Brown: 00:03:22

do you got for me?

Karen Pulver: 00:03:24

Well, I can tap dance.

Howard Brown: 00:03:28

Oh, I did not know that.

Karen Pulver: 00:03:31

I know you didn't. And I love to dance. And I took

Karen Pulver: 00:03:35

tap dancing when I was young. And when the pandemic hit, I

Karen Pulver: 00:03:39

ordered these tap dance shoes. Because you know, we couldn't go

Karen Pulver: 00:03:42

anywhere. So my basement and I put music on and I just tap away

Karen Pulver: 00:03:47

and it's really fun.

Howard Brown: 00:03:48

And it's therapeutic to

Karen Pulver: 00:03:50

it's so therapeutic.

Howard Brown: 00:03:51

Oh my god. I did. That's a great surprise. You're

Howard Brown: 00:03:54

tapping? Oh, that's awesome?

Karen Pulver: 00:03:55

Yes.

Howard Brown: 00:03:56

Well, take me through a little bit as far as

Howard Brown: 00:03:59

maybe roll back a little bit, you know, to either your

Howard Brown: 00:04:02

upbringing or actually you became a teacher. And that's

Howard Brown: 00:04:05

like the noblest profession there is. Tell me about how you

Howard Brown: 00:04:08

became a teacher.

Karen Pulver: 00:04:09

Well, I was not a good student. I didn't learn to

Karen Pulver: 00:04:11

read till I was in third grade. And I was a teacher looking back

Karen Pulver: 00:04:16

at my childhood, I believe I must have had a learning

Karen Pulver: 00:04:19

challenge because I could not seem to pick it up. I had a lot

Karen Pulver: 00:04:25

of trouble and my mom took me to a tutor. Finally in third grade,

Karen Pulver: 00:04:30

and I connected with her and she just really encouraged me a lot

Karen Pulver: 00:04:35

of it was confidence, I think. And I finally learned to read so

Karen Pulver: 00:04:40

as I got older, I realised that I wanted to help kids, you know

Karen Pulver: 00:04:45

who would be struggling and to overcome whatever it was that

Karen Pulver: 00:04:50

they were having challenges in school, and that's one of the

Karen Pulver: 00:04:54

main reasons why I became a teacher. I loved working with

Karen Pulver: 00:04:57

kids. I love being with kids. I love seeing their eyes light up

Karen Pulver: 00:05:00

when they learn something, because kids are not gone

Karen Pulver: 00:05:04

through all the social stuff that adults have. So like, you

Karen Pulver: 00:05:07

know, they love to play and I love to play. As you can see, I

Karen Pulver: 00:05:10

love to tap dance. So I just have fun being a teacher. And I

Karen Pulver: 00:05:14

also know that I'm really helping these children.

Howard Brown: 00:05:18

Yeah. And I mean, here's the thing, you're like a

Howard Brown: 00:05:20

renaissance woman because you're a model and an actress. And, you

Howard Brown: 00:05:24

know, you've done quite quite a lot, and you've been through a

Howard Brown: 00:05:27

lot. So the grateful goddesses Okay, how did you come up with

Howard Brown: 00:05:31

that? And it's, it's really cool. And I have to tell you,

Howard Brown: 00:05:35

I'm gonna confess I, you know, as you invited me to your show,

Howard Brown: 00:05:38

and present my cancer journey with another young woman's

Howard Brown: 00:05:41

cancer journey, it was a great honour to be on your show. I am

Howard Brown: 00:05:43

so grateful for that. And thank you, but tell me how it all

Howard Brown: 00:05:47

began and why you did it.

Karen Pulver: 00:05:50

Well, I was a teacher and a mom of three kids.

Karen Pulver: 00:05:55

Ah, well was my kids were getting older. I was working

Karen Pulver: 00:05:57

part time as a teacher. But there was something missing. I

Karen Pulver: 00:06:00

wasn't sure what it was. I knew actually, that I wanted to model

Karen Pulver: 00:06:03

when I was younger, be a model and an actress. So I first did

Karen Pulver: 00:06:06

that I first took some acting classes, I had some headshots

Karen Pulver: 00:06:09

done. And that was great. And that was fun. And that's today,

Karen Pulver: 00:06:13

I do a little bit of that. But I still felt something. I couldn't

Karen Pulver: 00:06:18

quite pinpoint what it was. So one day, I dropped my kids off

Karen Pulver: 00:06:21

at school, and I just decided to go for a walk. And I walked in

Karen Pulver: 00:06:24

walked into city, and I just stumbled upon a dance studio.

Karen Pulver: 00:06:28

And I went in and I signed up for a cardio strip tease. And I

Karen Pulver: 00:06:34

know it sounds like crazy, like, are you going to strip No, it

Karen Pulver: 00:06:38

wasn't stripping, it was dancing and moving around. She just

Karen Pulver: 00:06:43

called the cardio striptease to get women's attention. But it

Karen Pulver: 00:06:47

was such a freeing fun activity that I decided that even though

Karen Pulver: 00:06:52

I was a dancer, I never danced like that. So I felt so elated

Karen Pulver: 00:06:58

stepping out of my box. And that was, you know, a small box

Karen Pulver: 00:07:00

because I was a dancer. So I thought, How great would it be

Karen Pulver: 00:07:04

if I could bring this to people and really encourage them to try

Karen Pulver: 00:07:08

something new and to learn new things. So that's how the

Karen Pulver: 00:07:12

gatherings formed. The Grateful goddess name was just when I was

Karen Pulver: 00:07:16

in the shower once and I was just feeling so grateful. And I

Karen Pulver: 00:07:20

don't know, maybe I was using a goddess razor. I don't know.

Karen Pulver: 00:07:23

It's called plus, no, it was I feel really like, like, we all

Karen Pulver: 00:07:28

are goddesses, like we're all just to have so much in us that

Karen Pulver: 00:07:32

needs to come through. And that's how that happens. So

Karen Pulver: 00:07:35

these were gatherings in the city of Chicago with different

Karen Pulver: 00:07:38

venues. And it was a really great experience. And we learned

Karen Pulver: 00:07:41

a lot of things from different guests. And then as I mentioned

Karen Pulver: 00:07:44

to us, I then had cancer. So that halted things a little bit.

Howard Brown: 00:07:51

I know it and so any any shows that stand out or

Howard Brown: 00:07:55

any any lessons from interviewing so many people and

Howard Brown: 00:07:59

meeting and gathering to

Karen Pulver: 00:08:01

Yeah, first of all, just just the fun topics.

Karen Pulver: 00:08:05

You know, we we covered fashion, I had some fun with finance,

Karen Pulver: 00:08:10

finances, but teaching us you know how to handle finances. But

Karen Pulver: 00:08:13

that was good, because you feel really empowered that you can do

Karen Pulver: 00:08:15

these things, and make up and all of those kinds of things.

Karen Pulver: 00:08:19

But I also interviewed women and men. This was my first interview

Karen Pulver: 00:08:25

was this gentleman Jason rebel and he wrote this book.

Karen Pulver: 00:08:30

Eternity. He's a vegan chef. So I learned how to eat. I was for

Karen Pulver: 00:08:36

two years. I tried it. I liked it. But I still, you know,

Karen Pulver: 00:08:40

switch back. I learned from I just have a few books of people,

Karen Pulver: 00:08:44

Ellen Schwartz. B actually talks about lessons in life. And just

Karen Pulver: 00:08:51

like, we can't change the challenges we face, but we can

Karen Pulver: 00:08:54

change how we deal with them, for example, right? So a lot of

Karen Pulver: 00:08:57

those kinds of lessons came through. This was one of my

Karen Pulver: 00:09:00

favourite interviews. It's Dr. Edith Eger, she's a Holocaust

Karen Pulver: 00:09:04

survivor and a psychologist and she wrote the choice. And she

Karen Pulver: 00:09:09

talks about, you know, she survived Auschwitz every day,

Karen Pulver: 00:09:12

she'd get up and make the choice of how she was going to live her

Karen Pulver: 00:09:16

her day. And she had hope, and having hope is something that

Karen Pulver: 00:09:21

has gotten me through my challenges. That's probably the

Karen Pulver: 00:09:25

biggest lesson that I've learned is from her. But you and I share

Karen Pulver: 00:09:28

that because the last chapter of my book, which you know, is

Karen Pulver: 00:09:30

called sharing hope, so, we that you that's the fuel that gets us

Karen Pulver: 00:09:35

through for sure. So now, you're diagnosed with cancer. Do you

Karen Pulver: 00:09:41

want to share some details? Well, as a matter of fact,

Karen Pulver: 00:09:45

today, April 1 Is my cancer Versary you didn't know for

Karen Pulver: 00:09:50

listening a cancer Versary is the year wealth every cancer

Karen Pulver: 00:09:55

survivor does different but this was the day that I got the phone

Karen Pulver: 00:09:58

call. My whole world stopped. I actually felt like I was in the

Karen Pulver: 00:10:03

best shape of my life. And everything seemed to be running

Karen Pulver: 00:10:06

really smoothly with the kids and everything. And I had a bump

Karen Pulver: 00:10:10

on my back and I didn't know what it was. And it was it. She

Karen Pulver: 00:10:12

kind of felt like a mosquito bite. My husband, he's like, get

Karen Pulver: 00:10:16

it looked at. And I had three doctors three, tell me it was

Karen Pulver: 00:10:20

nothing. Don't worry about it

Karen Pulver: 00:10:23

grew and it got blacker and harder and weird. So I said, I

Karen Pulver: 00:10:27

just want to get it out. So I went to a surgeon who then said,

Karen Pulver: 00:10:30

Well, I can take it out. But you know, you're gonna have a really

Karen Pulver: 00:10:34

big scar. I'm like, I don't care. Just get it out. So she

Karen Pulver: 00:10:38

took it out. And then a week later, they had biopsy biopsy,

Karen Pulver: 00:10:41

because that's what they do. Yeah, just precaution. And I got

Karen Pulver: 00:10:45

the phone call that I needed to come in. And then I was

Karen Pulver: 00:10:48

diagnosed with B cell non Hodgkins lymphoma, and I needed

Karen Pulver: 00:10:51

radiation. And that was my cancer that

Howard Brown: 00:10:56

you did not have chemotherapy. You just did it by

Howard Brown: 00:10:59

radiation.

Karen Pulver: 00:11:00

Yes, I actually had what a lot of people said

Karen Pulver: 00:11:03

was the good cancer to have I mean, cancers, cancer, I I

Karen Pulver: 00:11:07

personally don't think that any cancer is a good one to have.

Karen Pulver: 00:11:10

However, it was slow growing, I caught it. Stage one. Had I

Karen Pulver: 00:11:17

ignored my gut instinct to get it removed, it would have

Karen Pulver: 00:11:22

probably spread and got to a you know, so I people listening.

Karen Pulver: 00:11:27

Just take precautions if you have anything that you're not

Karen Pulver: 00:11:30

sure about. And even if doctors right three tell me it was

Karen Pulver: 00:11:33

nothing. But if you feel it, go check it out.

Howard Brown: 00:11:37

Oh, 100%. Now I had T cell lymphoma, which was

Howard Brown: 00:11:41

blood cancer of the lymphatic system. But I was stage four,

Howard Brown: 00:11:44

and I had this big red and purple golf ball come out of my

Howard Brown: 00:11:47

cheekbone. And that was my towel. And if it didn't come

Howard Brown: 00:11:49

out, I wouldn't be here because I wouldn't have known because I

Howard Brown: 00:11:52

actually felt pretty good. And I was in the best shape my life

Howard Brown: 00:11:55

when I was 23. Then I also I agree with you 100%. So I have

Howard Brown: 00:12:01

to tell you during my you know, my motivational speeches that I

Howard Brown: 00:12:05

do I stop in the middle, and I tell everyone, if you're not

Howard Brown: 00:12:08

your best you, okay, what are you doing, and during the

Howard Brown: 00:12:12

pandemic, people didn't go to their doctor's appointments, so

Howard Brown: 00:12:15

they didn't get their mammography, they didn't go to

Howard Brown: 00:12:18

their lady doctor, they didn't get men for prostate or all of

Howard Brown: 00:12:21

us for colonoscopy, or even go to the dentist you're getting

Howard Brown: 00:12:25

screened, gives you a better chance, okay, if anything bad

Howard Brown: 00:12:29

happens, and I also agree with you, there is no good cancer,

Howard Brown: 00:12:32

bad cancer, it's pretty all bad. For the most part, it's tough

Howard Brown: 00:12:36

when you get those, you know that that phone call. And then

Howard Brown: 00:12:40

lastly, I we're just coming off of colorectal cancer awareness.

Howard Brown: 00:12:43

And all the cancers have colours, long is white and

Howard Brown: 00:12:47

breast cancer is pink, colorectal cancer, Evans, blue,

Howard Brown: 00:12:49

prostate is teal, there's all colours in the wheel. And I wear

Howard Brown: 00:12:55

blue almost every day if not, or I have a little blue pin, lapel

Howard Brown: 00:12:58

pin. And it's also for the people in treatment. Because I

Howard Brown: 00:13:02

will tell you this radiation, surgery, chemotherapy, the side

Howard Brown: 00:13:07

effects clinical trials, all that is no fun when you're in

Howard Brown: 00:13:10

treatment, no matter if it's just, you know, something that

Howard Brown: 00:13:14

is being treated. That's fairly small, a large all matters. And

Howard Brown: 00:13:18

lastly is that I wear blue to commemorate those that lost

Howard Brown: 00:13:22

their cancer battle that their cancer burden came to great and

Howard Brown: 00:13:24

get called to heaven. So I agree with you so much on that. And

Howard Brown: 00:13:28

what did you learn from that is that one you learn to get

Howard Brown: 00:13:31

checked and follow your gut. That was that's the key.

Karen Pulver: 00:13:33

I wanted the big a big lesson. But I also learned,

Karen Pulver: 00:13:38

you know, at first, I thought, Oh, I'm going to change

Karen Pulver: 00:13:41

everything. I'm going to change my diet. I'm going to I mean, I

Karen Pulver: 00:13:44

exercise every day. But I'm going to exercise twice a day,

Karen Pulver: 00:13:46

I'm going to do this. I mean, I just kept thinking about how

Karen Pulver: 00:13:49

what can I do now. But it wasn't really about that. That was kind

Karen Pulver: 00:13:53

of like New Year's resolution that lasts a month and then

Karen Pulver: 00:13:56

fades away. I mean, I like to have a glass of wine. I like

Karen Pulver: 00:14:00

chocolate. I like you know. But what I did do that I found was a

Karen Pulver: 00:14:05

big change was I've changed my mental state a lot. I started to

Karen Pulver: 00:14:10

set boundaries with people that I hadn't done before. I mean,

Karen Pulver: 00:14:14

doesn't mean but I I said no to things. I wouldn't take on as

Karen Pulver: 00:14:21

much as I did before because I think that stress has a very big

Karen Pulver: 00:14:25

part in it. And it's not that I was stressed at the time. But I

Karen Pulver: 00:14:30

was thinking what was it? What was it? You know? And I thought,

Karen Pulver: 00:14:33

well, maybe I just need to take care of my mental state more. So

Karen Pulver: 00:14:38

i i When I was tired, I would go take a nap. You know, you

Karen Pulver: 00:14:43

sometimes you fight those things because you're like, oh, no, I

Karen Pulver: 00:14:46

gotta be up the whole day. Well, no, I need to take a nap. I need

Karen Pulver: 00:14:49

to take care of myself. I need to maybe not be friends with

Karen Pulver: 00:14:52

that person because they're really draining. I'm going to do

Karen Pulver: 00:14:55

that. So all of those kinds of things from the cancer I learned

Karen Pulver: 00:14:59

because It's not that they told me you're going to die from

Karen Pulver: 00:15:03

this. But what I was told by my oncologist is that I'm on watch

Karen Pulver: 00:15:07

and wait. And I'm still on it. So I go every year, and that my

Karen Pulver: 00:15:13

life might be shortened. Well, hearing that kind of sucks. But

Karen Pulver: 00:15:18

same time, it's a bit of a wake up call. Because even though I

Karen Pulver: 00:15:22

have the, the good cancer, it's kind of like a scar and you

Karen Pulver: 00:15:31

don't want to like open up the wound, right? So you got to take

Karen Pulver: 00:15:33

care of yourself. So I learned how to physically and mentally

Karen Pulver: 00:15:36

take care of myself.

Howard Brown: 00:15:38

I love that discipline. It's really good.

Howard Brown: 00:15:40

And also the way that you were able to weed out the negativity

Howard Brown: 00:15:44

or people that were draining to you. That is hard to do. I

Howard Brown: 00:15:48

actually did that as well, the second time around, and it is

Howard Brown: 00:15:51

hard to do, but it is important to do in your time of need. It

Howard Brown: 00:15:56

really is. So all right, you got your life back, you're back on

Howard Brown: 00:16:01

track. You're healthy for a period of time. And then

Howard Brown: 00:16:04

lightning struck again, tell told me about this scary episode

Howard Brown: 00:16:08

of a stroke.

Karen Pulver: 00:16:09

14 years went by and you know,

Howard Brown: 00:16:13

you're raising your kids, you're doing your the

Howard Brown: 00:16:15

kids, life is good.

Karen Pulver: 00:16:16

When you have your five year cancer bursary, you're

Karen Pulver: 00:16:19

like, Oh, yes. And then when you have your 10 Oh, yes. Well, last

Karen Pulver: 00:16:23

year, February, again, a date. You know, April 1 Is the cancer

Karen Pulver: 00:16:27

one and February 12 Is the stroke one, but I was in New

Karen Pulver: 00:16:31

Orleans with my husband visiting my daughter and we were out to

Karen Pulver: 00:16:34

lunch. And I That morning, I just was tired. And I just was

Karen Pulver: 00:16:40

almost like a, like hungover, but I hadn't had I had two

Karen Pulver: 00:16:44

drinks the night before. I wasn't hungover. But that really

Karen Pulver: 00:16:46

lethargic feeling. We went to lunch and I wasn't hungry. And

Karen Pulver: 00:16:50

next thing I knew, I'm talking to my husband and my head just

Karen Pulver: 00:16:54

flopped down on the table. And I was what's called locked in. I

Karen Pulver: 00:16:59

didn't know what at the time, I didn't know what was happening.

Karen Pulver: 00:17:02

I thought maybe I fainted. But I was still totally alert and

Karen Pulver: 00:17:05

awake. So that's called locked in. So basically, I was grunting

Karen Pulver: 00:17:10

and crying, but I couldn't speak. I could hear I could see.

Karen Pulver: 00:17:13

But I, I couldn't move. And I couldn't communicate it. I

Karen Pulver: 00:17:17

didn't know what was happening. So they took me to the hospital.

Karen Pulver: 00:17:20

And subsequently, when they did the scan, they saw that I had a

Karen Pulver: 00:17:24

midbrain bilateral stroke. So I had a clot that had split into

Karen Pulver: 00:17:29

and went in, you know, the two sections of my brain. And I was

Karen Pulver: 00:17:34

paralysed like that for a couple hours until it cleared, it did

Karen Pulver: 00:17:39

clear on its own. And usually they they administer something

Karen Pulver: 00:17:42

called a TPA, to help shrink the clots and that's what they were

Karen Pulver: 00:17:46

going to do. But in the interim of me waiting for them to get

Karen Pulver: 00:17:50

that ready. I my body managed to clear them. And I still don't

Karen Pulver: 00:17:57

quite understand that. But the neurologist said to me that

Karen Pulver: 00:18:01

because I was in good physical health before you know I'm not

Karen Pulver: 00:18:06

diabetic, I don't smoke, moderate drinker exercise, eat

Karen Pulver: 00:18:10

well, that my body was like, almost like when you have a

Karen Pulver: 00:18:13

virus in your body attacks it right. So my body was able to do

Karen Pulver: 00:18:19

it. And I felt However, I did suffer. Because I had a brain

Karen Pulver: 00:18:24

injury. I do have some challenges. As a result of that.

Karen Pulver: 00:18:29

I mean, the cancer you don't you know, I have a scar on my back

Karen Pulver: 00:18:32

from the radiation and you know, you're tired, but then you get

Karen Pulver: 00:18:35

better, right? Oh, you feel better. But the stroke

Karen Pulver: 00:18:38

definitely set me back harder than cancer.

Howard Brown: 00:18:45

So I hadn't heard of locked in syndrome until we

Howard Brown: 00:18:48

had talked about it. And I mean, I can't even imagine you mean is

Howard Brown: 00:18:55

like being paralysed. To an extent, right. You couldn't

Howard Brown: 00:18:59

talk? You really move, right.

Karen Pulver: 00:19:01

I couldn't move. Yeah, I couldn't move. And, and

Karen Pulver: 00:19:04

I heard everything going on around me. And I wanted to

Karen Pulver: 00:19:07

scream like in my head. There was like a little girl, Karen or

Karen Pulver: 00:19:12

a little woman, Karen, who was talking, you know, the movie,

Karen Pulver: 00:19:16

Inside Out with the characters in the brain. That's what it

Karen Pulver: 00:19:20

felt like. It felt like there was a whole mission control in

Karen Pulver: 00:19:22

my brain that was totally working and going, Oh, she's

Karen Pulver: 00:19:26

having us things are happening hurry hurrry. But my body was

Karen Pulver: 00:19:29

not reacting. And then it turned on it was like when you shut off

Karen Pulver: 00:19:35

a computer,

Howard Brown: 00:19:36

reboot,

Karen Pulver: 00:19:37

reboots, that's what happens.

Howard Brown: 00:19:39

You rebooted and then the body took otherwise

Howard Brown: 00:19:41

they're gonna have to, you know, get in there and then also,

Howard Brown: 00:19:44

there's either in a stroke it's it's blood loss to the to the

Howard Brown: 00:19:48

brain, correct? Yes, yes.

Howard Brown: 00:19:51

Scary. That is absolutely scary. You It's just incredible. So I

Howard Brown: 00:20:00

mean, how did that going forward? I mean, again, I have

Howard Brown: 00:20:04

to tell you, I don't use it out of convenience. But I have a

Howard Brown: 00:20:08

form of PTSD. It's called chemo brain, or brain fog. And really

Howard Brown: 00:20:12

what it turns out is I can't remember names anymore. And I

Howard Brown: 00:20:15

was so good at names. But I do have trouble. So it that's not

Howard Brown: 00:20:20

the end of the world. But there's people that do complain

Howard Brown: 00:20:24

of that. I mean, I know that, you know, Vietnam veterans are

Howard Brown: 00:20:28

and are just regular people have seen battle habit, but a lot of

Howard Brown: 00:20:31

cancer patients also do have that as well. And do you have

Howard Brown: 00:20:34

any lasting effects? From this

Karen Pulver: 00:20:37

Stroke or cancer?

Howard Brown: 00:20:38

Stroke?

Karen Pulver: 00:20:39

Oh, yeah, definitely. Um, at first, my

Karen Pulver: 00:20:43

balance was off. And I fell quite a bit. I was in the

Karen Pulver: 00:20:48

hospital for a couple days. And then when they, they released

Karen Pulver: 00:20:51

me, they, they didn't necessarily give me rehab, they

Karen Pulver: 00:20:55

didn't think I needed rehab. Right away anyway. But so I

Karen Pulver: 00:20:59

would walk and fall, and it wasn't good. So I had to work on

Karen Pulver: 00:21:04

my balance. And there was a pool, at my daughter's building

Karen Pulver: 00:21:09

where we were staying. So I started like going in the pool

Karen Pulver: 00:21:11

and just walking, so if you fall, you fall in the pool. So

Karen Pulver: 00:21:15

my physical has definitely gotten better every now and then

Karen Pulver: 00:21:19

when I practice yoga, because I practice a lot. My right side is

Karen Pulver: 00:21:23

dominant. But my right side is, is more is less now. But it's

Karen Pulver: 00:21:29

the thing is how it's very minute. Like, it's such a small

Karen Pulver: 00:21:34

difference physically, mentally to I forget things all the time.

Karen Pulver: 00:21:39

But now it's a deeper, like a deeper forgetting. Like,

Karen Pulver: 00:21:45

there'll be a word in my head. And it's right there before it

Karen Pulver: 00:21:49

would be like, not there, and you just forget it. But now like

Karen Pulver: 00:21:52

it's like, there. And it's like stuck. And I can't always say

Karen Pulver: 00:21:57

it. So a lot of times I'll pause and I'll be like, okay, you

Karen Pulver: 00:22:01

know, like, you know, what's a call, you know, that thing.

Karen Pulver: 00:22:06

And, and trust me, I was really worried that it would affect my

Karen Pulver: 00:22:10

teaching, my coaching. My friends, being with my husband,

Karen Pulver: 00:22:15

I mean, my kids were getting frustrated.

Karen Pulver: 00:22:18

But you know, I have to remind them I did, I have had speech

Karen Pulver: 00:22:22

and memory processing therapy. And I've been told that, you

Karen Pulver: 00:22:27

know, I have to advocate for myself, and I'm also in a stroke

Karen Pulver: 00:22:30

support group. So I met with individuals who look like me,

Karen Pulver: 00:22:35

like worse, we're in our mid 50s. You know, I'm 57. Like,

Karen Pulver: 00:22:39

there's a few of us that are that age. And if you look at us,

Karen Pulver: 00:22:43

you think you're totally fine. And a lot of people say that to

Karen Pulver: 00:22:45

me, Oh, you look great. You're fine. I'm like,

Karen Pulver: 00:22:47

But I try every day, I learned something new, I try something

Karen Pulver: 00:22:54

new, and some things become my habits. And some things. You

Karen Pulver: 00:22:59

know, I just keep practising. I just keep going.

Howard Brown: 00:23:02

Yeah, invisible disabilities are real. And it's

Howard Brown: 00:23:05

hard for people to recognise that you've persevered through

Howard Brown: 00:23:08

so much. And because I've been one of your coaching clients, we

Howard Brown: 00:23:15

won't reveal what goes on between you and I because

Howard Brown: 00:23:17

that's, you know, privilege, of course, but you're an amazing

Howard Brown: 00:23:22

teacher. And so tell us about your coaching practice and how

Howard Brown: 00:23:26

you're helping people.

Karen Pulver: 00:23:27

I started when I was doing my live, grateful

Karen Pulver: 00:23:31

goddess show. So that's actually where I met you. So once a week

Karen Pulver: 00:23:35

wanting to incorporate, you know, I had the podcast over

Karen Pulver: 00:23:38

COVID. But I missed the interaction part with people and

Karen Pulver: 00:23:42

the teaching component. So I curated different activities. I

Karen Pulver: 00:23:46

had different speakers, and I had a weekly show live show. And

Karen Pulver: 00:23:51

I Okay, so now I'm having one of those. ....of course, it's hot.

Karen Pulver: 00:23:56

Well, everyone, and this is what happens. I'm in mid thought, and

Karen Pulver: 00:24:00

what did you ask me? What was

Howard Brown: 00:24:02

I asked you about your coaching practice. And

Howard Brown: 00:24:06

here's your keyword. Go ahead. There's your launch.

Karen Pulver: 00:24:09

So I had realised after the show, that people

Karen Pulver: 00:24:13

would stay on the Zoom, you know, by talking to one person

Karen Pulver: 00:24:17

and ever a lot of people would stay on. And they start talking

Karen Pulver: 00:24:19

to me and I'd start talking to them. And I realised, wow, I'm

Karen Pulver: 00:24:23

teaching, I'm teaching but I'm teaching adults now. And this is

Karen Pulver: 00:24:26

kind of fun. And this is Oh, look at and I've had certain

Karen Pulver: 00:24:29

individuals reached out to me and say thank you. You know, one

Karen Pulver: 00:24:33

person said that they had been inside and they hadn't gone

Karen Pulver: 00:24:37

outside. Of course, this was coat during COVID But she was

Karen Pulver: 00:24:39

very nervous to step outside. And I encouraged her to just go

Karen Pulver: 00:24:44

out and she went out. And that just felt really good that I

Karen Pulver: 00:24:48

could help you know these individuals. So I decided to

Karen Pulver: 00:24:53

become a coach and I studied psychology, but I didn't. I

Karen Pulver: 00:24:56

didn't want to do therapy. I wanted to help coaching is a

Karen Pulver: 00:25:00

more forward thinking type of experience. So you're helping

Karen Pulver: 00:25:06

people to get unstuck. And with coaching, the the problems that

Karen Pulver: 00:25:11

people have, aren't always what they want to work on. There's

Karen Pulver: 00:25:15

something deeper in there. It's not just like, Oh, what am I

Karen Pulver: 00:25:18

gonna do for my work? It's like, How can I be more confident? You

Karen Pulver: 00:25:24

know what I mean? So I love digging deeper into what it is,

Karen Pulver: 00:25:27

and then helping people.

Karen Pulver: 00:25:31

So I started the programme, and I was way on my way, getting all

Karen Pulver: 00:25:36

my coaching hours, and then boom, had the stroke. And I

Karen Pulver: 00:25:39

couldn't continue, I could barely string a sentence

Karen Pulver: 00:25:42

together. So I was I was depressed. I mean, I certainly

Karen Pulver: 00:25:46

had some downtime. And I learned to Howard that you have to allow

Karen Pulver: 00:25:51

yourself those downtimes. And don't beat yourself up. I was I

Karen Pulver: 00:25:55

was like, I'm never gonna do this. And it's like, no, no, I'm

Karen Pulver: 00:26:01

not don't maybe, but I'm going to rest. I'm going to work on

Karen Pulver: 00:26:06

one thing at a time. You know, little by little, just like

Karen Pulver: 00:26:10

riding a bike, just like trying a new skill. It'll be the best

Karen Pulver: 00:26:13

it'll be. And I continue tutoring with children. I

Karen Pulver: 00:26:18

continue to continue to coaching. And I haven't had

Karen Pulver: 00:26:21

anyone complain.

Howard Brown: 00:26:23

Well, I want to tell you that the thing that I

Howard Brown: 00:26:25

think that I only reveal a small teaser is that you took me

Howard Brown: 00:26:29

through my life wheel and we prioritised? That's what I

Howard Brown: 00:26:32

really appreciated that we got to the, you know, we got to

Howard Brown: 00:26:35

really what's important to me by prioritising on the life wheel,

Howard Brown: 00:26:39

and I thank you for that. And also, thank you for sharing

Howard Brown: 00:26:43

about what you do when you know you're feeling down scared or

Howard Brown: 00:26:46

anxious as well, because we're human. But you know, your

Howard Brown: 00:26:50

resilience is a muscle. Okay. And I would say that I built

Howard Brown: 00:26:54

Humpty Dumpty, you know, version three, oh, now I'm putting them

Howard Brown: 00:26:57

back together again. But we all get knocked down in life and in

Howard Brown: 00:27:01

business. And also in relationships, that's the most

Howard Brown: 00:27:04

complex one. And we have to be able to as my books as use our

Howard Brown: 00:27:08

light to get back up. And once we're back up, we go help

Howard Brown: 00:27:12

others. And this is what you've done. You're basically, you

Howard Brown: 00:27:15

know, model, you know, case study for my book is that you've

Howard Brown: 00:27:18

walked with darkness, you've learned from it, you've gotten

Howard Brown: 00:27:21

yourself back, and now you're helping others. And it's just

Howard Brown: 00:27:24

really, it really is so beautiful. And I'm so those of

Howard Brown: 00:27:28

you will, we'll give you in the show notes and on socials on how

Howard Brown: 00:27:31

to get in touch with you for your coaching because I think

Howard Brown: 00:27:32

it's really important. And you are so compassionate, and you

Howard Brown: 00:27:36

are such a good listener. So that that is what really makes a

Howard Brown: 00:27:39

good coach. Alright, so this is the time of the show, I'm gonna

Howard Brown: 00:27:42

have you put sunglasses on, if you don't mind, we're going to

Howard Brown: 00:27:45

put on our shades because this is the shining brightly

Howard Brown: 00:27:48

spotlight. And of course, you're a model. So you have the best

Howard Brown: 00:27:51

quote, look and shades. And I wanted to tell people how to get

Howard Brown: 00:27:55

in touch with you, how they should to get in touch you for

Howard Brown: 00:27:58

your coaching and all that now I'll include all your links on

Howard Brown: 00:28:01

social links as well. And then wait. And then lastly, I know

Howard Brown: 00:28:04

you have prepared an inspirational quote. So then

Howard Brown: 00:28:07

share that and then kick the show back to me. All right, I

Howard Brown: 00:28:09

will kick it back to you. Yes,

Karen Pulver: 00:28:11

first, you can reach me in many ways you can go

Karen Pulver: 00:28:14

on my website, and it's great for WWW dot grateful

Karen Pulver: 00:28:18

goddesses.com goddesses and you'll have it right written

Karen Pulver: 00:28:22

out. So people you know make mistakes of goddesses.com and

Karen Pulver: 00:28:27

also email me personally Karen Pulver pul ve r@yahoo.com. And

Karen Pulver: 00:28:35

my quote

Howard Brown: 00:28:37

I read before that you have a giveaway

Karen Pulver: 00:28:39

right away your giveaway giveaway is I'm going

Karen Pulver: 00:28:44

to give away a discovery session with me it's valued at $125 and

Karen Pulver: 00:28:51

we can do this by zoom and we can just get on top with each

Karen Pulver: 00:28:55

other and see something that you want to work through and I can

Karen Pulver: 00:28:58

help guide you there and then if you'd like to continue with me

Karen Pulver: 00:29:01

as long as you did, and we can continue

Howard Brown: 00:29:06

I love it alright, let's let's shine share some

Howard Brown: 00:29:08

inspiration with what you got.

Howard Brown: 00:29:11

Okay, it's hard to see out of these glasses go take the

Howard Brown: 00:29:13

glasses off we shine

Howard Brown: 00:29:16

if you can,

Karen Pulver: 00:29:18

you've always had the power my dear. You just have

Karen Pulver: 00:29:20

to learn it for yourself. So this is a bag my sister in law

Karen Pulver: 00:29:23

got me but this is I live by and my past and grateful goddesses

Karen Pulver: 00:29:28

is all about this and my life really. Because in the Wizard of

Karen Pulver: 00:29:32

Oz, Dorothy, all the characters wanted all of these things

Karen Pulver: 00:29:36

right? They wanted intelligence heart.

Karen Pulver: 00:29:42

Courage, courage, a brain, a brain and they kept thinking the

Karen Pulver: 00:29:46

wizard is going to give it to me. Oh, Dorothy is going to go

Karen Pulver: 00:29:48

home because the wizard is going to get and we all think that in

Karen Pulver: 00:29:51

our lives, right? Yeah. If only we had this then we get this if

Karen Pulver: 00:29:56

only this and who's going to we're going to strive towards

Karen Pulver: 00:29:58

someone else telling us

Karen Pulver: 00:30:00

We all had it at the end. They had it in themselves, right?

Karen Pulver: 00:30:03

Because the wizard says, well, actually, you are smart. And

Karen Pulver: 00:30:08

actually, you are brave. And actually, Dorothy, you just have

Karen Pulver: 00:30:11

to click your heels and then you'll be home. So I feel that

Karen Pulver: 00:30:14

we all have the power within us. And as a coach, as a teacher,

Karen Pulver: 00:30:19

I'm going to help guide you to find that power.

Howard Brown: 00:30:23

It's great. It's using the Wizard of Oz. To say,

Howard Brown: 00:30:28

yes, you have it within you, and you can do it. It's beautiful.

Howard Brown: 00:30:31

It's really is. All right. Well, this has been a really important

Howard Brown: 00:30:35

show. And it's, I'm just so glad you came on and told your

Howard Brown: 00:30:39

stories, and are lifting up others. That's that's, that's,

Howard Brown: 00:30:44

it's such a beautiful thing. So well, you can, you know, I want

Howard Brown: 00:30:47

to say I got a shout out a few folks that helped me along the

Howard Brown: 00:30:50

way. So my publisher front edge publishing, read the spirit.com,

Howard Brown: 00:30:54

which comes out every Monday, and I blog in that usually

Howard Brown: 00:30:57

almost every week, and then my finishing house for my podcast

Howard Brown: 00:31:00

is amplify you and they just make me look so good. And I want

Howard Brown: 00:31:04

to say thank you to them for making me look good. And then

Howard Brown: 00:31:07

how to get a hold of me is shining brightly.com And you can

Howard Brown: 00:31:11

find the book you can find the podcast and also the

Howard Brown: 00:31:14

motivational speaking. And then most importantly, my advocacy,

Howard Brown: 00:31:18

like my work in, in cancer, my work with entrepreneurship and

Howard Brown: 00:31:22

mentorship and leadership. And then lastly, my interfaith

Howard Brown: 00:31:25

relations work. And those are the things that really matter at

Howard Brown: 00:31:28

the end of the day. So let's all just try to shine brightly, a

Howard Brown: 00:31:31

little bit more for ourselves, go lift up others in our

Howard Brown: 00:31:34

communities in our neighbourhoods, and yes, the

Howard Brown: 00:31:37

world would be a better place. Karen Pulver it's been a

Howard Brown: 00:31:39

pleasure. Thank you. Thank you.